Remember that you are dust…

I was raised Lutheran and chose to consider myself Lutheran up until a couple of years ago.  I still understand and appreciate my Lutheran roots, but now I find it so much easier to just say that I am a Christian.  I don’t follow a theology; I follow Christ. But growing up Lutheran taught me a lot about liturgy and helped me to grow a lot of respect for the more “ceremonial” high Holy days.  Ash Wednesday was always one of my favorite services to go to, and I can’t quite explain why.  It reminds us of our sinful nature, our mortality, and that no matter what, our physical body will exit this world simply as dust. The solemnity intrigues me as does the symbolic display and reminder of our baptism.  We proudly wear our ashes on that day to show that we are good catholic (little c) Christians who went to church that day.  My motivation now is to wear my ashes every day, not necessarily as a black smudge on my forehead, but as an outward display of my decision to follow Christ.

I was constantly reminded of my serious lack of ability to resist temptation and stick to my goals today.  Everything really started off great, but as soon as my husband put out an idea for a seriously delicious dinner, my portion control went out the window.  It was a struggle, but I know that I at least made some healthier decisions that I had the past few weeks.  That is what is important to me.  I am not expecting perfection on day one, but I am expecting progress as I move forward.

Eat: I made good choices until dinner time, and then I chose to have about twice as much steak as I should have, and really couldn’t resist the creamed corn for some reason (sweet tooth anyone?).  Of course I just had to celebrate National Drink Wine Day, and the Malbec was delicious.  2/3 of the day followed the plan.  I’m a bit disappointed in myself, but I’ll take it for now.

Pray: I didn’t spend as much time on my devotion as I had hoped to this morning, but I had some awesome time during my workout to turn on our local Christian radio station and just check in with God.  I believe my prayer of the day was “Please help me make it for one more minute. Please help me make it for 30 more seconds. Please help me start to like the treadmill…”

Write: Done. I also wrote a bunch of nasty grades on my students’ half-hearted attempts at a project. Sigh…

Run: 30 minutes on the treadmill first thing this morning.  I hit 3.44 miles which definitely isn’t where I need to be right now, but once again, I’m looking for progress from here.  I also am deeply praying for warmer temperatures because I don’t know if I ever can like the treadmill.

Tomorrow: Jon (my husband) and I both took a personal day off from work.  We are going to go on an adventure and put our cell phones away for the day (except for pictures of course).  We are not checking our work emails.  We are not answer work calls or text messages.  We are just taking time to be young newlyweds on an adventure.  I am unbelievably excited for it!

Preparation

I would consider myself to be a (mostly) healthy person.  I eat right (most of the time), exercise (fairly) regularly, spend (some) quality time just with God every day, take (limited) time to learn new things daily, and (occasionally) take the time to reflect on my day.

And there lies the problem.  I try so hard to make those statements true, but there is always a condition established to make the statement true.

In 6 and a half weeks, I hope that I can say the following without my nose growing:
I AM a healthy person.  I eat right, exercise regularly, spend quality time just with God every day, take time to learn new things daily, and take the time to reflect on my day.

My motivation and inspiration is Jesus.  My foundation and support is the word of God. My sidekick is the Holy Spirit.

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written:

“‘He will command his angels concerning you,
    and they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’”

Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor.  “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.” Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.’” Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.”
– Matthew 4:1-11 (NIV)

Following his baptism, Jesus fasted for forty days and resisted temptation.  He lived on the word of God and relied on the Holy Spirit to be his wingman against Satan.  God also calls on us to let go of the things that burden our lives and knock us out of balance.  With God’s foundation, Jesus’s example, and the Spirit’s guidance, we, too, are able to let go of what burdens, bind up what is broken, and grow in faith and love.  On Easter, I hope to emerge broken, fixed, and ready to grow and be salt and light for Christ in the world.

That long-term goal sounds great, but there is a lot that needs to happen in order to accomplish it. Because of this, I’m breaking my journey down into a series of short-term daily goals that will serve as my checklist of sorts.  Here’s my daily to-do list:

• Eat: clean. I will be following the Beachbody 21-day fix meal plan as strictly as I can for all 40 (+6) days of Lent.
• Pray: daily and often.  I will commit to spending at least 15 minutes of my day (either in chunks or all at one time) immersed in the word of the God and in conversation with God.
• Write: about my journey.  I will write a daily update, even if it is only a few sentences long.  I also want to spend more time reading a variety of literature to grow my own knowledge.
• Run: daily.  I will either run, do that day’s 21-day fix workout, or do both every day.  I need to get back in this habit badly for so many reasons.

It sounds so simple, but it definitely will not be easy for me.  Time management will be a huge issue as I am currently balancing my full-time teaching job, part-time graduate school, recently-married homeowner life, and will begin coaching softball next week.  Motivation has always been an issue for me, so I am relying on God’s word and on support from those around me (including a 21-day fix challenge group that I am in) for support.  I fall victim to temptations all of the time, and I am often a lazy, sweet-snacking, sleepy sloth.  I will have to challenge myself holistically, but making holistic changes is the only way that I can truly grow.

Check back often (daily, actually) for updates on the challenges, changes, and growth that will occur between now and April 5th.  I am excited to share the journey with you.